3 Reasons why I Listen to Men
1) QUESTION — ANSWER
I like to learn, I really do. As a fundamentally curious person, I want to know a lot of things. If the person I am talking/listening to can teach me something about a topic I want to know more about, then I am a patient and grateful listener. But only if I asked for it!
What I find hard to bear and where I close my ears are outpourings on topics in which I might even know more or all those unsolicited, never-ending lessons. No thanks. (Read my 3 reasons why I don’t listen to men)
2) FEELINGS AND THEIR CAUSES
A simple: “I feel bad” is not enough for me. It becomes beautiful and profound when men can express their feelings and have also thought about why they are feeling this way now. I like to listen to that. Tell me about your feelings, I want to understand them too!
3) ALMOST WHISPERING … WITH RESPECT
As we know, and this is not a cliché, men usually have deeper voices and usually louder voices than me. To use this advantage at a round table or in a discussion to make yourself heard is unfair. As a self-reflective person he should be aware of his powerful voice and should be able to adapt the volume to the situation and the other person. I like to listen when the volume matches what is being said. Lower your voice, please.
WHAT I WANT
I love conversations where
a) the topic is interesting to most people at the table.
b) everyone takes their turn regularly and in turn if they want to.
c) it’s not about winning, but about sharing and learning.
d) there is an attitude of an open mind with open ears, open eyes and where there is also silence sometimes.
We have to design those kind of conversations intentionally.
This is what we try to make happen in EXPEERTs.club. We meet regularly and follow our so-called “meeting.manuals” to make sure that the talking stick goes around and that everyone has her time on stage and in the spotlight.
We want every woman to have her say, we deliberately want to hear every voice, every opinion.
In our EXPEERTs.club, we talk about our goals and our challenges to achieve them. And then we share our knowledge and experiences to help each other succeed.
The small teams of 5 members are only women because we can relate to the feelings and experiences of other women from all over the world. We are able to listen. And we are empathetic. Join our club, feel invited! Reach out to us! www.EXPEERTS.club/letstalk #womenonly
Author: Cloed Baumgartner (yes please, let’s start the conversation in the comments!)